Grieving losses, yet celebrating life

Aug. 7, 2010- We lost our 12 week old unborn baby. (Ruby)
March 8, 2011- We lost our 12 week old unborn baby. (Nathaniel)
June 2011- We had time to grieve our losses with my(Beth's) family. We also celebrated their short lives in the womb and their eternal lives with our Heavenly Father. We shared this time with my brother and sister-in-law as they experienced miscarriages in the past.

I read chapter 17 of Heaven is for Real to the whole family. It is a super powerful chapter for anyone who has lost a baby. We talked about the life of a baby inside the womb and how God had already created it to be special and it has a soul. We talked about loving our babies even without ever holding them or playing with them. The cousins had some great questions and comments. We read Psalms139:13-16

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother's womb.
I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I'd even lived one day.

We wrote letters and drew pictures to the sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, cousins, neices, nephews, and grandchildren that we were never able to hold. We listened to a song that really ministered to me during my time of grief.

Praise You in This Storm
words by Mark Hall/music by Mark Hall and Bernie Herms
I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth

You can listen to it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHdcyue0bSw

We tied the notes to balloons.

Then we released them to God, who is taking care of our little ones until we meet them one day in heaven. Oh what a joyous day that will be!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Healing little by little...

If anyone is looking for a good resource to read or to give a grieving family, we would recommend these resources...
Empty Arms: Hope and Support for those who have suffered a miscarriage by Pam W. Vredevelt (Jun 6, 2001)

An Empty Cradle, a Full Heart by Christine O'Keeffe Lafser and Phyllis Tickle (Oct 1, 1998)

Heaven is for REAL (specifically Ch. 17)

A Path Through Suffering by Elisabeth Elliot (specifically Ch. 17)

"Our circumstances are not the window through which we understand HIS LOVE,

but rather we must view our circumstances through HIS LOVE."

Focus on the Family also have great resources and support groups.

http://family.custhelp.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/25740